But the Lord…

In 2 Tim. 4:17 Paul says “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.”

If you’re a pastor, and you are reading this, you have probably read this verse a hundred times, taught it, or quoted it dozens of times, and you don’t need some other guy to give you his take, but here I am, giving you my take. Why? Well, there was something that resonated with me the last time I read it and my hope is, it will resonate with you as well. Last week I was having a conversation with a friend, a guy who has been in ministry for years, and he started reflecting on how he first got into ministry, his “calling”. He apologized for saying “my calling”, but he had no better language. After he finished a bit of his story, I started sharing a bit of my story, my “calling”, that moment when I was 16 yrs old, and through a series of events I sensed God calling me into full-time ministry. There is a part of me that is embarrassed to share this, part of me knows that “callings” don't mean paid ministry at all, and part of me feels exposed talking about what I experienced almost 40 years ago at age 16, yet I also know that there is power in that moment. Power back then, and power today - because in so many ways, even after years of heartache, failure, unmet desires, years where I am embarrassed at how I led or taught or treated people, I am still compelled to follow, I am still compelled to grow, I am still compelled to listen, to love and to know God. What my friend said resonated with me - there is a calling on my life. I bring all of this up in context with Paul’s words here in 2 Timothy because as I have read Paul, I know he had his struggles. You know many of them too - he was beaten, shipwrecked, etc. etc. and on top of that, at times he felt ‘less than’ the super apostles. In fact, later in 2 Tim 4, he reflects back on another story, another struggle in his life, he writes in vs 16 “The first time I was brought before the judge, no one came with me. Everyone abandoned me.” - I sat with that for a bit - everyone abandoned him. Everyone. Can you imagine? Standing before a judge, his life, his future is at risk, and no one is there to stand with him - not his family, no one from any of the churches he planted, there wasn’t a younger disciple with him, he was alone. How in the world did a guy in that situation stay in the game? How did he stay faithful? We see a bit into the life of Paul in the next verse when he says these powerful words “But the Lord…” Paul says everyone was gone, everyone abandoned me, I was before the judge, alone, all seemed lost “But the Lord”…he continues “But the Lord stood with me and gave me strength” 2 Timothy 4:17 I can’t tell you the number of times over the last few decades where I felt abandoned, betrayed, alone. My family and I moved 1,000 miles to a new city to plant a church, and I would have conversations with people who would say, “the work Jesus did through this church saved my life but it is not doing it for me anymore.” Time and maturity have now given me the perspective to see that our church plant may not have been the best place for that family to grow, but at the time? Ouch, it hurt. You're tired, you’re exhausted, you have faced a lot of trials, you and your family have paid a heavy price, and the last thing you want to hear is “we are leaving”. The years of ministry have been littered with these stories, but there was one situation that almost took me out. I was a campus pastor and I was forced to resign from a church I had been connected to for 25 yrs. The work I put in, the years of service, the sacrifice, all of it felt discarded, my future was in doubt, and the leadership team of that church tried to brand me as a divisive person who needed to be cast out of the tribe. I can still clearly remember that first Sunday morning after I was pushed out, a Sunday when I thought I would be teaching at the campus I used to lead, but now found myself walking at a park in my neighborhood - hurt, confused and scared to death. In the midst of all of this, I was crying out to God, while feeling lost - key people I had looked up to had not only abandoned me, they attacked me, and yet I so connect with what the Apostle Paul said, I was lost, abandoned, scared - but the Lord…As I walked on that path, the Lord stood with me, Jesus comforted me and He whispered in my ear, “I got you”. That moment rooted me deeper in my experience of the faithfulness of God and I hope it stirs something up for you. I hope it reminds you of the times when you felt all was lost, whether it was at your own hands due to your own decisions or due to the decisions of others or maybe it was news from a doctor. I hope it reminds you of the times when all felt lost, when the things or people that you thought would deliver are gone…but the Lord…Jesus was there. He rescued you, He stayed with you, He brought you to a deeper place of trust and faith.For me, I am 4 years out from walking in that park in my neighborhood, healing is taking place, I am gaining perspective, but I don’t have it all figured out yet - I mourn what was lost and I also am so grateful for what I have gained. I obviously don’t know what has happened in your story, I don’t know what you need to hear today - but I do pray that if you are hurting, if there is heartache in your life right now, and you can also relate to that sense of calling, that desire to see Jesus and his ways reign in our world - that you may be encouraged by the words “But the Lord…”

Dave Richa
Pastor
The Table - Lemont